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I think she pushed him,' I said to you quietly. 'I think she pushed him...' As soon as I held my baby Violet in my arms, I knew something wasn't right. I had always known that the women in my family aren't meant to be mothers. My husband tells me I'm nothing like my own mother and that Violet is the sweetest child. But something feels very wrong. Is it her or is it me? Is she the monster? Or am I? A Sunday Times and New York Times Bestseller.